POSER AS SEX TOY

DAZ Productions, 3d model maker, seems to have finally come to terms with the fact that Curious Labs' Poser product is mainly used for erotic purposes. This week DAZ released a new female model, which seems intended to be a sex doll and a texture set for the newest iteration of the Michael model, called simply "Very Hairy". I'm guessing that's for gay "bear" fans.

Fleshbot hasn't picked up on this yet.

(Side note: My old landlords were "bears", and ran a mail-order merchandise company out of their apartment, downstairs from mine. Sometimes I would get their mail by mistake. In the upstairs apartment was a somewhat-geriatric professional dominatrix. Sometimes I would get her mail by mistake. It's amazing how little difference there was between the two: leather, straps, and bound men were ubiquitous. You could say they "predominated".)

TEXT AND SUBTEXT

My analysis of this poster:
TEXT: There are legal options available for battered women.
SUBTEXT: Women should develop powerful muscles so that no one can pick on them.

WIZARD CHESS

Remember that game of Wizard Chess that Harry, Ron and Hermione played in the first Harry Potter film? I had an interesting thought today: what if Hermione had been "promoted"?

POISON TV

The UPN affiliate in New York replaced Star Trek: Enterprise tonight with something that is very nearly its perfect opposite: Little Women.

LEGISLATIVE PROPOSITION

Proposition: if a kid on a skateboard maneuvers it such that a pedestrian has to dodge him not once, but twice within thirty seconds, then it ought to be legal for the pedestrian to beat the shit out of the skateboarder on the spot.

This kid on a skateboard near Washington Sq. Park, on the sidewalk, swerved in front of me today. I dodged left, and he articulated an arc that put him directly in front of me 8 seconds later. I stepped right, and he somehow wound up heading right at me within 15 seconds.

I should have ripped his head off.

BOJAY WORK

Some of you may remember me writing about some illustrations that accompanied an article in a circa-1990 bodybuilding magazine. I believed they were done by the age-regression artist Bojay, and that was recently confirmed to me by one of his associates. The associate was kind enough to send along a scan of draft line work that Bojay had done for the assignment.

Rather than immediately post the line work, I asked Eegore - femuscle's colorist to the stars - if he could do something with it. And did he! So now we have a recovered and restored pre-Internet FMG artifact: the illustrations for "How Bodybuilding Beat the Bully".

The essay described how a young girl was targeted by a bully, took up lifting weights, and was able to beat the bully arm-wrestling. Now, she doesn't turn into the She-Hulk or anything - the growth is very modest. But the expressions and body language of the protagonist change in such a way that indicates she went from feeling powerless to feeling strong and confident. I think it's very impressive. I've posted it to Lingster's Brand Name Messiah, in the files section, under "Bojay".

Also, please remember that Bojay is selling a compilation of his sketches and artwork here. Eegore has no product to hype, so he'll just have to settle for all of us being impressed with his coloring.

TV ALERT!

Looks like the Dustin Diamond/Robin Coleman Star Dates is getting play on E! today. It's playing now, at 5pm EST, maybe again later...I'm checking.

Update: Nope, that's it. Robin made a really good impression - despite being 6' tall, 180 pounds, and being incredibly strong, she still looks like a girl. She doesn't have that steroid look at all - nice skin, curvy, pretty. And she comes off as a very down-to-earth lady.

FUNNY NOTE

About three years ago I was sitting alone in my living room, drinking a six pack of beer and watching, for some reason, Star Trek Voyager. (It was a bad day, what can I say?)

Anyway, I was just going through an old notebook, and found a clip of dialog I wrote down while watching that episode drunk: "The doctor removed my spinal clamps, but it will be a while before I'm playing hoverball." For some reason, that line struck me as absolutely hilarious when I heard it. Hilarious in the sense of wondering what kind of jackass would have the gall to actually put that dreck on paper.

NEW RENDER UP

Check out the Lingster's Brand Name Messiah files section for a new rendered tableaux. The backstory is this:

Despite two rounds of successful human trials, the FDA ultimately rejected Dr. Numa Maddik's quantum breast augmentation procedure. The commission claimed Maddik had left it few options after it came to light that she had concealed, using a minimizer bra and altered photographs, that particle seepage had caused most of the technicians involved in the project to become incredibly stacked.

Though her bustline was phenomenally improved, Maddik's reputation was destroyed, and her seed capital reclaimed by angry investors. It was then that Maddik was contacted by the shady Female Liberation Underground Freedom Front (FLUFF). They offered to finance her research if she would build them a quantum strength transposition engine, which would completely pillage the vigor and skeleto-muscular development of a man, and then cause an inverse surge of development in a woman. The first test, involving 5'0", 87 pound Marsha "Skeeter" McPherran and 6'2", 230 pound Stanley Creel, was a near-total success, resulting in Skeeter reaching a new height of 6'4" and bodyweight of 260 pounds, while Creel was reduced to 4'7", 54 pounds. Transfer efficiency was better than 98%.

Creel suffered significant brain damage during the procedure, equivalent to a loss of about 35 IQ points. While Skeeter has yet to be tested, it is suspected by some that she has made a substantial gain in cognitive development, commensurate with Creel's loss. As she was already a gifted medical student, in addition to being one of the strongest women on the planet, she may also now be one of the smartest.

So there you go. Warning: Nudity.

FIREFLY GOING ON SALE SOON

The Firefly DVD comes out in three weeks - it's now #42 in Amazon sales rank.

AWKWARD IN EXECUTION, BUT NOBLE IN PURPOSE

This render at Renderotica is pretty good - you'll need to sign up to see it. It shows a slender girl looking in a mirror, and seeing a sword-wielding amazon looking back at her.

SVETLANA PUGACHEVA

Charisma - some girls got it, some don't. I saw a link this morning to a photo of Ms. Pugacheva, and charisma runs out of her in a torrent. The camera loves her, and reviews of her stage routines are glowing. Here's an interview with her in Russian, and there's a nice gallery that accompanies it. She's simply foxy.

EXPERIMENTING WITH MORPHS

So I spent two or three hours last night making a new morph. One of the frustrating things for me is that none of DAZ models come with a pectoral shelf morph - the ability to create a strong-looking, rounded upper chest. So I made one. An example (nude) is in the Poser section of the Files directory in Lingster's Brand Name Messiah.

RHONDA DETHLEFS

I found her profile on HerBiceps, thought she was cute and clicked through to Rhonda's site. She has some things to say that are really interesting, such as "My first experience in the weight room was in high school gym class. Quickly I became stronger or as strong as many of the guys." Also,

...Then I got a break from work and decided I would try a gym membership for just a week. I was hooked again. Weeks turned into months and months turned into years. I had made it in there almost every day. I saw drastic changes in my body, I loved having the strength and power. I went from a skinny 105 [pound] girl to 123 lbs in just over a year and looked fantastic (the only drawback being that i had to get rid of all my cute little dresses because they no longer fit.)

She's married. Damnit.

CUTE PRODUCT

DAZ has rolled out a new product for creating cool morphs in 3D figures. The demo is cute, shows a girl growing a bicep.

NEAT NEW YORK MAG COVER

Pretty nifty. I'm not sure why they chose this moment to run that cover, because this has been going on for years, but it's not unappreciated hereabouts. And I'm not even all that into GTS.

MARKNEW PRODUCES A NEW STORY

I'm thinking "Selfless", a Buffy episode from season 7, must have just played in Britain, because Marknew penned a similarly bleak, surreal story called "Swinging". "Selfless" focuses on Anya's time in Sweden, 800 years ago, and is filmed in grainy, Ingmar Bergman-esque style. Mark's story has the same tone.

I like it.

WILL FERRELL ISN'T FUNNY

He's like Chevy Chase with a lobotomy. Why do people spend money to see him in movies? I don't understand it.

FLESHBOT HAS LAUNCHED

Blog baron Nick Denton has kicked-off his third "pro-blog". After the success of Gawker (NYC culture) and Gizmodo (gadgets), Nick has brought forth a sexblog called "Fleshbot".

From what I've heard, Nick's initial plan was to have Choire Sicha edit Fleshbot, but then Choire wound up doing Gawker when that blog's original editor went to New York Magazine. As for the two people who are writing Fleshbot - Jonno d'Addario and Carly Milne - I've never heard of either of them. In hindsight, I wouldn't be surprised if my invitation to the Gizmodo party had something to do with the Fleshbot launch.

Thus far, Fleshbot seems a little scattershot. CGI porn is featured strongly, and there's a strong fetish component. I'm not sure that the blog will be able to develop a readership if it features subjects as diverse as gay and straight, normative and fetish, etc. Most people like to read about sex, but only their kind of sex. If the Internet has made one thing abundantly clear, it's that everyone has at least a few kinks, and those kinks are spectacularly varied in nature. The Internet has enabled people to find others who are similarly bent - I'm not sure what purpose is served by a clearinghouse like Fleshbot.

Another problem is that many people read blogs at work. Fleshbot has explicit graphics, which are not "work friendly", and may get readers in trouble. I keep Lingster's Big Mouth entirely graphics-free just for this reason - text-only is the brown paper wrapper of the 21st century.

Still, Fleshbot is inarguably a strong effort - the design is great and there's an enormous amount of material. And if Nick's other blogs are any indication, Fleshbot will be updated frequently, every weekday. If I were asked for advice, I'd suggested reducing the size of the article graphics, eliminating suggestive graphics, and adding humor or cartoons.

FUNNY SEARCH OF THE DAY

Big mouth women at AOL. Whaddaya suppose that's about?

WHAT MADE ME

I was a late bloomer. In the spring of my sophomore year in high school, I was on the track team with a beautiful freshman girl who lifted weights and at 14 had already reached her full adult height of 5'8". I was childlike compared to her - four inches shorter at the time, probably 10 or 15 pounds lighter. She did shotput and 100m hurdles, I was a 3200m man. She had amazing shoulders.

Her mother was single and sometimes had trouble making ends meet; my parents tried to direct work the mother's way, both from their own business and through referrals. I suspect that the mother said nice things to her daughter about my family, and by extension, about me. And so I had a fan.

Thereafter the girl often flirted with me, but I was horribly intimidated because she was beautiful and very adult. I was very obviously still a boy, with braces and, y'know, just...very...awkward.

One time after track practice, a bunch of us were waiting in the lobby for the after-school bus. She was wearing a cut off sweatshirt that left her navel exposed. I was entranced by it - the shape of it was lovely, and seeing it made me flush. I was 15, and I think it was the first time I ever felt sexual passion rise in me. I kept glancing at it, and she caught me. What she did next was fairly surprising - she walked over, threw me over her shoulder and carried me outside. She tripped and fell on top of me, which hurt a little bit, but then she kissed me full on the mouth as we lay in the grass, making the boo-boo all better, let me tell ya. She got up and went back inside. I stayed there for a bit - my whole world had changed. I was dumbstruck.

Periodically thereafter she would sneak up on me and put me in gentle wrestling holds, or initiate some other form of mock-violence. She was very playful, and I reciprocated - one time I poured a bucket of ice down her track jersey, another time I crawled under her bus seat and tied her shoe-laces together. Time went by, and I caught up with her, and kept growing. Senior year one of her friends insisted that I should ask her to the prom, but I didn't have the confidence to do it. I didn't find the confidence to approach girls that pretty until years later. Our relationship, such as it was, left me with a taste for strong, assertive, playful women.

I ran into her at a party about seven years ago - she only came up to my nose and I outweighed her by about 40 pounds. She rushed me with a wrestling move but it was a pretty simple matter to put her gently into a headlock and tickle her until she started kicking me. Her husband was right there, so we didn't keep it up for very long. But it was poignant. After that she set me up with her little sister, but it wasn't the same.

Sigh. Missed opportunities.

EXPERIMENTING WITH DESSERT

So I'm having a dinner party next week, and I'm experimenting with desserts. I like to come up with my own stuff - I invented a lemon rosemary chicken recipe years ago that I still roll out on special occasions.

Anyway, I tried adding whiskey to flan, before it solidified. It seemed like a good idea at the time - I figured the smooth texture of two fingers of Tullamore Dew would merge nicely with the caramel in the flan. Bad idea, it turned out: the flan started to curdle and break down. It got all soupy and never congealed. I might try fondue now - that's usually a hit at parties. Or I could keep it simple and just serve apples and cheese - that's always nice at this time of year.

I AM IN LOVE

Marc2410 posted some photo links at DtV yesterday, and one of the women featured is so beautiful and built that the photo made me lightheaded. You can see for yourself, here. She reminds me a bit of Summer Kalish, except even cuter.

Her name is Paulina and she's probably Swedish. That's all I know.

She looks a bit like a girl I used to date. Before I'd dated her, we worked together, and one day I overheard her complaining to a friend about her appalling lack of physical strength. She'd joined a gym, and was embarrassed that "I couldn't even do two push-ups. Bent knee push-ups!" (I sometimes find slender, weak girls enticing, because if you can get them to work out, they only have one way to go. Plus it's usually fairly easy for them to get some definition.)

NEW TETSUKO WORK

David C. Matthews finished the tranformation scene for his new version of Tetsuko. It's pretty hot. He says it will be awhile before he posts any more work on this comic.

I've written before that I really like the style he's using for these new manga-style comics - it's very clean, and I like the bold lines.

JENNIFER BFL CHICK

I was Googling around and found this site, about a chick named Jennifer who's looking pretty good. She went from being rubenesque to being kind of brawny looking.

MATRIX: REVOLUTIONS

Like tens of thousands of other nerds around the world, I went to see the new Matrix movie tonight. It's pretty good, though damned if I can figure out what the ending meant. Anyway, there are two women in the Zion infantry who are pretty jock-looking. One is obviously muscular, looks like maybe she's a former bodybuilder.

"SINGLED OUT" EYE-DALIS GIRL

One of the things I've cherished, and shepherded from hard drive to hard drive as I 've switched PCs over the years, is a set of crude screen caps from a 1997 episode of "Singled Out". Carmen Electra must have just taken over from Jenny McCarthy when the episode in question was filmed, but she's not the object of my affection in these caps. Instead it's one of the guests, a girl with the most perfect breasts in all creation, who called herself "Eye-Dalis". Someday, when we're all too old to take full advantage, young women will be able to receive therapy based on the DNA of someone like Eye-Dalis, and breasts like hers will be the norm. In the meantime...sigh.

I posted the screen caps to the files section of the Lingster's Brand Name Messiah Yahoo! Group, linked at top left.

THE ACTION HEROINE'S HANDBOOK

I spotted a book in the Astor Place Barnes & Noble the other day, called "The Action Heroine's Handbook" It's got a broad-shouldered girl with a pronounced bicep on the cover, but there's nothing like that inside, despite the same artist doing the interior illustrations. It looks like a cute book, though - lots of tough girl maneuvers.

SCIENCE FICTION MOVIE BOOBS

I've been under the weather this weekend, and watching SciFi Channel movies. One thing I've observed - women in these cheapo science fiction productions generally have great tits. I'd link to pictures if I could find them, but for the most part they're not available online. But I've been thinking about it, and there are a few reason this might be the case:

1) Movie has lower production values, thus sexiest actress is cast over most talented actress.
2) Producers believe having really sexy, busty girls will increase revenues.
3) Producers realize the movie is going to be a flop anyway, so they hire the girls they'd most like to fuck.
4) The entire production is just an excuse for the producers to meet hot girls.

I'm going with #4.

BILLIARDS BEAUTY

Just on Fox & Friends, a segment with 9-Ball super-hottie Ewa Laurence. Wow!